


Not Mine

by aimtoplease



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-20
Updated: 2014-07-20
Packaged: 2018-02-09 15:22:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,791
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1987926
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aimtoplease/pseuds/aimtoplease
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry hates Perrie.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Mine

**Author's Note:**

> I don't have anything against Perrie, so if you are a Zerrie fan or a Perrie fan, I don't think reading this the one for you! :)

Harry hates Perrie.

Correction; he _loathes_ her, he physically can't stand her. her straw like blonde hair, that sickly annoying Geordie accent. And those fat lumps she passes off as "boobs". Harry has never hated anyone before, he's not that kind of guy. Harry loves everyone, he just hates her. His reason why? Zayn. Zayn is not _his_.

When Zayn first mentioned Perrie in a interview, Harry wanted to be sick, he also wanted to fall over and laugh his fucking head off. but he held back and leaned into Louis seeking some sort of comfort in his jacket. The time when Harry established his real hate for her was the other night whilst they were on tour. Zayn was in the next room with her, they finally had a day off and Harry was looking forward to sleeping the whole day, when he heard her voice screaming,

_"harder, harder, Zayn, come'on!"_

Every single hair on Harry's body stood up. _how dare she?_ how dare she ask for more.

Had it been Zayn pounding into Harry, Harry would appreciate every single thrust, thanking Zayn for his delicious cock, Harry knew he'd be tight for Zayn, if he had to, he'd squeeze his buttcheeks together just so he'd be even more tighter for Zayn.

Harry would do anything and everything for Zayn, he'd follow him to the end of the world. He was prepared to be Zayn's _slut_. He was prepared to even consider calling Zayn his _master_ , his _sir_ , as got his own cock hard by rubbing it against Zayn's thigh, staring into those golden eyes.

Little did Harry know, that night, Zayn clamped his hand around Perries mouth, urging her to be quiet, hating the sound she makes when she asks for him to pound into her harder. he hates how it makes him feel _pathetic_.

Zayn didn't come that night.

 

+

 

When Harry first whispered hoarsely _'thank you, sir'_ after giving a blowjob, it felt like all of Zayns lungs had been punched and he couldn't breathe, like he never knew what love really was.

Harry never meant for it to slip out his mouth, but it felt right. Zayn is his master. He would do anything for the tanned guy.

 

+

 

After Perrie had left, and Zayn was back to just texting her. Harry felt like he was kind of at peace, Perrie wasn't there to piss him off that much that Harry would go clubbing just to find a blonde haired girl to fuck in one of the loos, coming at the thought of Zayn wrapping his warm firm hands around his neck.

When Perrie left, that also meant Zayn would sleep with Harry. Harry likes this idea, he likes sleeping next to Zayn because he can wake up early just to watch Zayn breathe heavily and his chest rise up and down. Harry wants to touch, he wants to run his fingertips over every single tattoo inked into Zayns caramel skin.

Harry knows Zayn can't sleep without him. and he _definitely_ likes that idea. Obviously when Perrie comes to stay, Harry convinces himself that Zayn is tossing an turning in his room unable to sleep.

_Harry is right_.

Zayn was staring out the tour bus window, it's late into the night, they just left London and heading off to wherever Louis told him, but he wasn't really listening to him. they were on the motorway and Zayn is craving the taste of tobacco. The night is late.

Zayn is looking at the trees planted one next to the other, he's looking to see if he can see a ghost or a person amongst them or even something pretty, when he feels a surge of warmth seeps through his tshirt and burns his skin. Zayn knows who it is, he always does. _Harry_.

_Harry_ his heart thuds. Zayn lets Harry's long limbs wrap around his waist whilst he carries on looking out the window.

"Zayn?" Harry breathes into the back of his neck as if he's trying to etch his words into his skin.

Zayn hums his reply.

"What you looking for?"

"Something beautiful." Zayn breathes, still staring out the window.

"I think you're beautiful."

Zayn smiles. Harry always compliments him with sappy comments but Zayn will swear on his dog, that he doesn't like it, especially when Harry compliments him. Then Harry does something out of the ordinary, he gently kisses the back of Zayns neck and Zayn thinks he stops breathing.

 

+

 

Harry stumbles back into his hotel room with Zayn's hands firmly held his face as if the idea of letting go was impossible, _is impossible._

Harry had been teasing Zayn all day, whispering filthily in his ear, deep and low, telling Zayn how tight he would be, how he would make Zayn come harder than he ever has before. Wrapping his arms around Zayns board chest, rubbing against him just to show how hard he was just by looking at Zayn.

Zayn kicked the hotel door shut with his foot and grabbed Harry's sweaty Ramones T-shirt, pushing it up to feel that Harry was already shaking beneath his fingertips. Zayn let his fingers glide down to Harry's belt and started to unbuckle it and pushed his hands in to feel Harry's growing heat through his boxers.

"Fuck you're so wet," Zayn gasps into Harry's mouth as Harry pushes his tongue into Zayn's hot mouth. "Is this what I do to you?"

Harry doesn't say anything but drops to his knees and tugs at Zayn's jeans whining at the back of his throat like he needs it.

"Alright, alright,"

Zayn breathes pulling his belt off his jeans and throws it behind him and unbuttons his jeans whilst Harry sits back on his heels waiting like a wanton dog; waiting for its treat. his eyes glued to Zayn's hands.

Zayn finally gets his jeans and boxers down and Harry growls and looks up at Zayn for permission. Zayn nods slowly trying to control his breathing. Harry tentatively reaches for Zayn's cock and moans. Zayn throws his head back and counts to ten.

Harry inches closer and whispers "look at me, Zayn."

Zayn licks his lips but only managed to get to _eight_ and looks down. Harry keeps his eyes on Zayn. Pupils blown and Zayn doesn't know if his eyes are black or green. Harry licks the underside of Zayn's cock and Zayn nearly stops breathing as a fat bead of precome oozes out and Harry suckles lightly on the head and then purses his lips and covers Zayn's cock with his mouth. Zayn's closes his eyes cause it's _fucking_ obscene and if he looks then he knows he'll come much more quicker than he should. Harry happily sucks on Zayns cock. slurping on it like a fucking lolly and Zayn is sure that his mouth is a sin. So tight and pink.

Zayn lets out a shaky breath and opens his eyes. his mouth opening wide as he groans, "Jesus fucking Christ!"

Harry is staring at Zayn with his mouth stretched around his cock and his eyes glisten and Zayn's heart does that thing again. Harry lets go of Zayn's cock along side with a string of saliva with precome connecting to his mouth and Harry sucks in back into his mouth and swallows. He grabs Zayn's cock and brings it back to his lips and drags Zayn's cock across his lips like its lipstick and another fresh bead of precome oozes and covers Harry's lips making them glisten as if he just put on a fresh coat of lipgloss and Zayn groans.

Harry swiftly gets up and grabs Zayn's face and pushes his lips onto his.

"Taste that?" he rasps and Zayn does.

_He can taste it all._

Zayn growls and sucks so hard on Harry's lips making them a dark pink and raw, not wanting to let go, he pushes his tongue into Harry's mouth wanting his tongue to be the only thing Harry can taste.

Zayn wants to be his first and last. His everything and nothing. He wants crawl under Harry's skin and run through his blood. He wants to be the first thing Harry thinks about and the last before he closes his eyes. He wants to be better than Harry's first fuck or his first kiss. He wants to dominate all his dreams and become all of Harry's reoccurring dreams and nightmares.

He wants to be all the fruit Harry loves to eat. He wants Harry to be like the paint caked underneath his nails, relentless to leave even after cleaning his hands for the eighth time before a show. He wants Harry to always be like the first cigarette he ever tried out. He wants Harry to be the feeling he had when he had his first fight; thrilling yet terrifying. He wants Harry to be like the first blossom in spring, unwilling to leave the tree. He wants Harry to be the prettiest painting he has ever painted.

So that night Zayn leans over Harry whilst slowly thrusting in him and breathes ' _I love you,'_ against Harry's lips, tattooing the words into his raw lips, feeling his heart burn and burn searing through his body.

Harry had always been there for him, Harry was just always there. Zayn feels guilty for not noticing him at first. Of course he noticed him, he was in the same band as him. But he was so worked up with trying to make it work with Perrie and his family that he never realised the little things Harry would do for him.

Like resting his chin silently on Zayn's shoulder as he drew yet another on of his imaginary aliens, whereas, none of the others would really give a shit because Zayn always draws aliens. But little did Harry know, Zayn wouldn't let the others watch him draw apart from Harry. he would share his food with Zayn cause he knew that when Zayn was tired, or just in a mood, he'd never eat, as if all the other emotions overwhelmed him so much that he was prepared to forgo his empty stomach. Harry would feed him slowly making sure that Zayn would take big bites. after that, he'd pull Zayn to his bottom bunk and lay beside him with his and sing him a soft lullaby that Gemma had sung to him when he was younger as the bus slowly hummed underneath them. Zayn would breathe in Harry's scent pulling Harry closer to him and nestling his face into Harry's neck while Harry played with his hair and just like that, Zayn would fall asleep. Since then he couldn't sleep without the curly haired boy.

It got to the point where Zayn couldn't sleep with Perrie cause he was so used to sleeping with Harry. He'd toss and turn whilst his arm was stuck underneath her; all heavy and Zayn didn't like it anymore. He did like Perrie. St first. He saw the fucking world in her, he thought she was the one, but she never did the little things or even the big things for him. 

_'I love you too.'_

 

+

 

**ONE DIRECTION'S; ZAYN MALIK ENGAGED TO LITTLE MIX'S; PERRIE EDWARDS.**

 

Harry is _furious_. He is so angry, fists clenched beside him as he walks back and forth at home. Niall is sitting on the chair with a packet of crisps in his hands.

"How dare he?"

_"I know, Harry."_

"I mean seriously, they haven't been going out for long!"

_"I know, Harry."_ Niall bites into another crisp.

"What the fuck is going on?"

_"I know, Harry."_

Harry stops in his steps and looks at Niall to find him staring out the window. Harry's eyes soften and he sits on the floor next to Niall.

"You okay, Niall?"

Niall shakes out of his reverie and looks down at Harry trying so hard to smile but Harry sees through it so Niall doesn't even bother lying to him.

"I guess- I guess tomorrow will be about them and not about the film," he breathes looking away from Harry.

"Yeah she'll probably come in and show it off." Harry scoffs.

"It's just that-" Niall shakes his head, "I thought he would tell us all together not just Louis." He sighs.

"I know, bro," Harry sighs getting up on his knees and hugging Niall tightly.

"Don't worry we'll just say that you're pregnant or something," and Harry knows Niall is smiling.

 

+

 

"Harry, _please-_ "

"I'm tired and i want to get myself off, Zayn."

Harry tries to shut the hotel door. but Zayn shoves his foot in between the door and Harry resigns and walks into the bathroom. He doesn't want to wank, well he does but he can't do it with Zayn in the other room, he'll hear him call his name and Harry can't risk that, Zayn's marrying his perfect ' _it'_.

Harry takes a fifteen minute shower, he prolongs it for another five minutes, just to see if Zayn would get bored or just leave. He walks out with a towel snugly tucked around his lower half to find Zayn standing by the door awkwardly, deciding whether to go or stay.

"Are you going?" Harry asks monotone.

Zayn grips his bottom lip and Harry thinks if he holds it any harder, he might bruise or even cut the skin. He finally lets go of his lip and Harry breathes, suddenly looking down to find a pair or boxers and a tank top. Zayn just watches him, Harry roots through his bag, he just wants Zayn to leave, he can't cry in front of him. Harry pulls on his white tank top and drops his towel which earns a little cough on Zayn's side and slides he legs through and jumps onto his bed.

"Are you gonna stand there all night? I was planning on getting some sleep before our flight back home tomorrow."

Harry puts his arm over his eyes and even outs his breathing when he feels someone sit next to him and pull his arm away.

"You've stopped sleeping with me." Zayn whispers so quietly that Harry questions whether he actually heard him or not.

"I thought you was the clever one?"

Zayn stiffens.

Harry slowly sits up and Zayn can't keep his eyes off him and it's taking all of Harry's willpower (which isn't a lot) to kiss his frown away, kiss him until Zayn's drunk with it. But he's so broke, he can't look or even think about Zayn without tears forming at the corners of his eyes. The interviews were so hard trying to put on a show for everyone and Harry deserves to cry, he should be allowed to in the privacy of his own hotel room, but here's Zayn with his perfect jawline, perfect cheekbones, perfect lips and eyes, perfect fucking face, just everything is perfect about Zayn and it hurts to know that Zayn will never be Harry's, and Harry doesn't know if he can take it anymore.

"You haven't spoken to me since the London premiere." Zayn states.

Harry knows, he knows and he can't exactly deny it but its hard to talk to someone without screaming in their face and wanting to punch them in the face.

"I know," Harry says and Zayn looks down fiddling with his jumper before looking back at Harry.

"Why?" He breathes.

Harry laughs, he throws his head back and falls onto the pillow and laughs, laughs until his stomach hurts, he laughs like how he does when he pops icecubes down Louis' back, joyful and mischievous. Zayn frowns when Harry is at the point where he can't breathe and it hurts to take air into his lungs.

"Doesn't matter,"he whispers because his throat is hoarse.

Zayn grabs his wrists and pins him to the bed. Fury running through his blood. Harry laughs a little but just smiles as Zayn pins him down, he has had thoughts about this, where Zayn would pin him down and kiss him till his lips were a darker shade of pink, kissed raw as he was demanding more and more, like he couldn't get enough, and he would think about how Zayn would move down to his neck and cover him in bruises and lovebites, claiming Harry as his own. This is different.

_Different_.

"Why?" Zayn grits his teeth and is so so close to Harry, if only he could lift his head up and brush his lips against his.

"You should know why," Harry smirks.

"No, no I don't Harry so why don't you fucking help me out and tell me why you won't talk to me, why we don't sleep together, why you don't feed me anymore, why you're never there anymore?"

Zayn's eyes are so golden with subtle hints of yellow, _so beautiful_ , his breath smells heavily of nicotine and Harry knows that Zayn was smoking about three before coming up to his room. He knows. He will never know that again Zayn's _engaged_.

Zayn is _hers_.

Harry could say everything, how he has slowly fallen for Zayn. How he sees the fucking world in the fuckers eyes. How badly he wants to crawl into Zayn's bed and kiss him till they both are shivering. How he's willing to do anything for the boy, how he can only breathe when he sleeps beside Zayn and the air between them is warm. He likes it when his breath is mingled with Zayn's, just like now. He can finally breathe after a month. So Harry settles for; "sorry."

He is defeated. He was Harry fucking Styles and he has lost, lost over his golden eyed boy, who never was his to begin with, but Harry liked to think he was at times.

When Harry would walk into Zayn's room after drinking way to much. They would sit there talking and share secrets that no one ever knew about. Not even their own families knew. Harry would tell Zayn about the things he would of done if he wasn't in the biggest boyband in the world, how he would have like to be a photographer. No one knows that. Zayn does. Harry learnt that Zayn was bullied immensely during school, like how four boys cornered Zayn in the art block and poured red paint down his new jeans and tshirt that his mum had brought for him. He learnt that it was the first time Zayn cried properly. How he ran home and locked himself in his room for hours trying to find a way to get rid of the clothes before his mum found out. Eventually Zayn stuffed them into a bag and on his way to school he threw the clothes in the bin.

Harry knows many of Zayn's secrets. He doesn't get to know that.

_Not anymore_.

He can't keep tricking himself into thinking that Zayn's his, Zayn belongs to someone else now.

"'Sorry?' Don't give me that, Harry." Zayn scoffs and lets go and Harry can no longer breathe again.

"Just-" Zayn breathes trying to process his thoughts. "Just come back to me, please."

Harry watches Zayn bite bottom lip again and he has to look away.

"I can't." Harry whispers.

Zayn's head pops up his eyes tight and he's frowning as if to say _why?_

"You don't belong to me, not anymore."

"What do you mean?" Zayn's eyebrows pinch together.

"You're- hers."

Harry can't bring himself to say her name, it slices his heart again, he looks down, defeated and he just wants Zayn to leave now. He wants to cry and sleep and do the exact same thing tomorrow.

"I don't understand-"

"I've fucking fallen for you! Your stupid eyes, lips, stupid face, your stupid way of talking to people, your stupid accent that sounds so orgasmic when you say my name, the way you let me sit with you when you draw but don't let anyone else, the way you stroke my hair, the way you breathe against my neck when we slept together, I'd do anything for you, jump off any cliff, attempt to cure any disease, anything, just anything to make you happy or even smile, I just- go away Zayn, please you at least owe me that, just go."

Harry pushes Zayn's chest with very little effort he has, Zayn doesn't budge. He doesn't even speak. So when Harry looks up, green eyes blurred with tears. Zayn kisses him.

_'I'm yours.'_

 

+

 

Harry has never been to Zayn's house, he just never had the reason to, parties were always thrown either in his or Louis' house. So Harry never needed to go to Zayn's house.

But tonight Zayn has asked Harry if he'd like to go back to Zayn's house after a day of promoting their new album.

Harry said _yes_.

As Harry parks outside his house and his stomach does this weird thing that no matter how much water he drinks it won't go away. The night it late so there isn't anyone outside so Zayn's slides his hand into Harry's and squeezes tight as if to say everything's going to be okay. They reach the door and much to Harry's surprise Zayn holds his chin so delicately that he's afraid that Harry might disappear and kisses him slowly, and opens his door blindly.

"-And this is my graffiti room"

Zayn walks in and sits on that ugly sofa that Harry remembers from their film. He's seen Zayn's graffiti room from the film but this is better, the room smells metallic, the smell of paint and a hint of _home_. Harry smiles and looks around at the walls running his fingers across the little aliens and drawings Zayn has done on the walls.

Zayn watches him intently; quiet as Harry takes in all the colours and smells. Then Harry stops, he spots something and Zayn stiffens. Harry walks over and reaches up to touch it-

"Don't! It's wet," he hears Zayn call out and he drops his hand and continues to stare.

"This is me." He breathes.

He has seen Zayn draw him a couple of times but this is different, this is a painting and not a two minute wonder. He can see Zayn put a lot of effort into the painting, the intricate details and the soft brushstrokes.

"Yes, babe it's you."

Harry feels Zayn wrap his arms around his waist allowing Harry to lean back onto his shoulders.

"It's beautiful."

Harry keeps his eyes on the painting until he can feel Zayn nudge him with his nose and he turns when Zayn places his lips against his and hums. Zayn always hums whenever he kisses Harry like he has found his solitude in him.

"Nothing compared to you, baby."

**Author's Note:**

> find me on tumblr:  
> jawlineanddimples tumblr.com
> 
> zarryzarryzarry


End file.
